No I’ve Never Met Anyone Who Is Difficult!
By Dr Judy Esmond
In my ‘dealing with delightfully difficult people’ conference presentations I always ask
the attendees to raise their hand if they have ever met, dealt with or escaped from a
difficult person in their life. Without hesitation all hands shoot up into the air. After all,
haven’t we all come across someone who we have found difficult at some time? Except
one day, one hand stayed down.
I’m not often surprised when speaking about how to deal with difficult people, but now I
was intrigued. Here was someone who had never met a difficult person. So I had to stop
and ask the lady in the front row. “You’ve really never met a difficult person?” I asked.
“No” she said and shook her head. There was silence from the rest of the audience in the
conference hall. “You have never found the behaviour of someone else to be difficult?”
I asked again. “No never. I’ve never met a difficult person”, she said firmly. “So what
do you do when you disagree with someone?” I queried. “I never disagree with anyone”,
she said, “I just always walk away and I never argue, I never have conflict and so I have
never met a difficult person and I like everyone”. And there ‘hidden’ in the response
was the answers to my questions.
DON’T DEVALUE YOUR OWN IMPORTANCE
When we avoid ever expressing a difference of opinion with others, we may avoid
difficult situations but we also devalue the importance of our own thoughts, ideas and
opinions being heard.
ACCEPTANCE OF DIFFICULT PEOPLE IS IMPORTANT
So its time to accept that when we express ourselves and respectfully disagree with
someone they may not like what they hear and they may not like you. For as Peter
McWilliams explains: “acceptance is such an important commodity, some have called it
the first law of personal growth”.
You may not get on with everyone you meet and they may not like you and that is alright.