The DBL Times
April 2009 Editor: Carla Kerr
China to Adopt English as Official Language
The Chinese spokesman for Ministry of Education claimed China would adopt English as being
its official language.
Facing hundreds of reporters in a press conference, James Smith (whose former name is Zhang
Yu), the spokesman, said the law would become effective on 1st April 2009. When a journalist for
the Economist asked why the Chinese government made such a shocking decision, the
spokesman replied, “For the sake of international trade.” XUE JIALIANG
Easier to Pick Up Foreign Language
Earlier today, BBC radio listeners were told that people can gain the ability to use a foreign
language by taking pills.
It said that 6 different colours of pills will help people to install 6 different languages: English,
French, Portuguese, Chinese, German and Spanish. People can take them 4 hours in advance.
Then you are ready!
A lot of people intend to try. MONICA
Language Pills for Instant Learning
Researchers of Massachusetts created new pills for learning. Take one pill per day for one week,
and you will have instant learning. You’ll be able to speak any language very easily. Just read the
dictionary. ANA & EMERSON
Eiffel Tower to be Dismantled
The people who live in Paris said that the Eiffel is too ugly compared to other buildings. The
Eiffel is too old for modern Paris, so the government has decided to dismantle it. Also, people
always use the Eiffel to commit suicide, so it is a horrible place. DONG
Royal Family to be Abolished
Research shows us that English people are dissatisfied with the Royal Family, because they don’t
need to do anything. They get lots of money and a good lifestyle from when they are born.
People complain that they have to work and pay taxes, and the Royal Family doesn’t. The
English think if they abolish the Royal Family, the constitution will be changed, and they will be
able to ch