Obsession Phrases PDF by Kelsey Diamond

GET this pdf and discover the Truth and the Facts about Obsession Phrases™ by Kelsey Diamond before you decide to buy the ebook!
man word make feel thing emotion
GET this pdf and discover the Truth and the Facts about Obsession Phrases™ by Kelsey Diamond before you decide to buy the ebook!
man word make feel thing emotion
1
Disclaimer:
 
This book is written for informational purposes only. The author
has made every effort to make sure the information is complete
and accurate. All attempts have been made to verify
information at the time of this publication and the authors do
not assume any responsibility for errors, omissions, or other
interpretations of the subject matter. The publisher and author
shall have neither liability nor responsibility to any person or
entity with respect to any loss or damage caused or alleged to
be caused directly or indirectly by this book. 
 
2
Table Of Contents
Section 1 - Understanding the Male 
Mental Theater................................................................ 19
Section 2 - The Big Secret of Obsession 
Phrases......................................................................... 39
Section 3 - The Razzle-Dazzle Phrases ............................. 53
Section 4 - Everlasting Attraction Phases.......................... 66
Section 5 - The Whiz Bang Phrases.................................. 81
Section 6 - Attraction Spinner Phrases ............................. 95
Section 7 - Obey Me Phrases......................................... 109
Section 8 - Emotional Transparency 
Phrases....................................................................... 122
Section 9 - Love Cocktail Phrases................................... 133
Section 10 - Mutual Pleasure Phases.............................. 147
Section 11 - The Monstrous Intrigue 
Phrases....................................................................... 161
Section 12 - Secret Fantasy Phrases.............................. 175
Section 13 - Permanent Obsession Phrases..................... 187
Section 14- Subconscious Bonding 
Phrases....................................................................... 200
Section 15 - Monogamy Awakener 
Phrases...................................................................... 211
3
Closing Thoughts......................................................... 224
4
 Introduction
 
  
My name is Kelsey Diamond, and I’ve got a story to tell – like 
most noteworthy stories, it began with hearing the most 
ridiculous thing in my entire life. 
 
Have you ever heard something so outlandish that it just makes
you kind of tilt your head like there’s water caught in your ear? 
 
This was one of those moments. As helpless as we are to 
explain these bizarre moments that defy all rationale or 
standard process, we can’t help but be left in awe by them.
 
You may or may not have had one of these moments related to 
a friend of yours going through an unexpected relationship 
issue – the relationship issue may have even been your own. 
 
Whether or not you’ve had to console a friend struggling with 
an inexplicable rough patch in their love life, or experienced 
such an abrupt and frustrating situation yourself, you can 
probably relate to Melanie.
 
Melanie, one of my best friends in the entire world, had been 
with her boyfriend happily for three years – that is, up until the 
night that he decided to leave.
 
She had been going about her day without even the slightest 
premonition that anything could be amiss with her love life, 
when out of the blue, she found her entire world turned upside 
down and shaken violently as carelessly as a bag of potato 
chips.
5
 
It was an extraordinarily late hour when the phone rang, the 
time of night where the phone only rings if there’s some serious
business waiting to be discussed on the other end of the line – I
picked up the phone and was immediately blown back by a tidal
wave of torrential emotions that can only be produced by a 
woman betrayed.
 
Melanie was on the other end of the phone, shouting her lungs 
off and calling her boyfriend all kinds of nasty names. 
 
She used a lot of different words to describe him, some a lot 
less family-friendly than others, but there was one recurring 
word that stuck out among all of the rest: “pig”. 
 
“He’s a complete pig,” she told me. “A big, fat, stinking chunky 
pig.”
 
Considering how madly in love she had been with this man, to 
hear her using such words to refer to him was more than a little
jarring. 
 
I don’t know how long she want on calling him names between 
sobs, but by the time it died down, I was confident that the 
volume of those insults had just about exceeded every positive 
thing that she’d ever said about him before – she had said 
many, many positive things about him in the past.
 
The volume in her voice seemed to be gaining at an exponential
rate the longer our one-sided conversation went on, and after a 
bit of time, it sort of sounded like I was listening to a verbal 
nuclear explosion go off in slow motion through the receiver.
 
To say that Melanie was pissed off wouldn’t do enough justice to
6
even simply say that it didn’t do it justice. 
 
It seemed like she didn’t only consider her boyfriend a selfish 
jerk without care for anyone other than himself – she may as 
well have considered him the living embodiment of pure pain, 
pestilence and suffering.
 
When I felt like I could get a word in edgewise, I asked the 
safest thing I could think of:
 
“What’s wrong, Melanie? What’s the matter? Care to explain? ”
 
She didn’t mince any words in her reply.
 
“He left me…” she said dejectedly.
 
I had been ready for her to say he’d done something on the 
level of burning down her family home in an psychopathic or 
alcoholic rage, but the fact that he’d just casually left her 
without warning was even more strange. 
 
They had never shown any signs of turbulence in their 
relationship before, which can sometimes be sign of something 
explosively bad waiting to happen, but for a couple like them to 
just unceremoniously disintegrate without any incident or 
fanfare didn’t make any real sense. 
 
I had been curious before, and now I was just plain stunned.
 
The best that I could do to verbalize my shock and dire need for
further exposition was a sincere, “…What?”  
 
“Are you seriously telling me that he left you Melanie?” 
7
 
“Yes! He left me.” She replied in a very convinced tone. 
 
As she expelled the full brunt of her pain to me, I couldn’t help 
but be brought back to the same times that I’d found myself in 
the same position.
 
I knew all too well what it was like to have the romantic carpet 
ripped out from under you and be left sprawling on the ground 
with nothing but the emptying sensation of betrayal and wild 
outrage.
 
I wanted to be able to lend advice to her to help her cope, but I
was helpless myself because I didn’t have any real details on 
the situation yet. 
 
But as she explained things further, I got the biggest shock of 
my life. 
 
She told me that not only had he just left her out of nowhere 
like a snowstorm in June, but he’d even packed his bags and 
decided to relocate his entire life into the home of another 
woman that he was secretly hanging out with behind Melanie’s 
back. 
 
In fact, he just disappeared overnight and left a stupid little 
note to explain the reasoning behind what he’d done, or more 
accurately, the lack of reasoning.
 
To put it nicely, he wrote in the letter that he no longer loved 
her – to be even clearer, he actually went as far as saying that 
he had in fact never loved her at all. 
 
Shocked & disturbed by this letter, Melanie felt like she had 
8
never really known or understood this man at all. 
 
How could he do this to her, she thought?  
 
Simply put, he had made a half-hearted effort at clarifying why 
he had decided to leave her out in the cold, but it had only 
served to raise even further questions in Melanie’s head. 
 
But the truth was bitter because the only thing that provided 
the most clarity as to what motivated his actions was, 
unfortunately, the most upsetting thing of all for Melanie.
 
And that was this – He had been passively cheating on her for 
several months.
 
Can you imagine how much this must have rattled her world? 
 
Melanie was wrestling with the realization that she had 
essentially been in an imaginary relationship for months. 
 
But let me tell you the weirdest thing about it all. Melanie was 
the “TYPE” who was on the “Hunt Rader” of every man out 
there. Every man hungered to possess her, capture her and do 
anything in the world to be with her. 
 
When we were younger, Melanie was the type of friend that you
always have to look to with equal amounts of jealously and 
admiration when it comes to physical health. 
 
She seemed to have a supernatural ability to stay at peak 
human fitness despite eating everything the rest of us try and 
fail at reserving to once a week, and on top of that, her skin 
was flawless. 
9
 
She had an infectious laugh, a more-than-respectable career, 
and an intimidatingly sharp wit – more than a few guys had 
found it too intimidating after just one or two dates.
 
And once she met this guy, my best friend Melanie who was the
shameless demigoddess, assumed the form of a giggling 
schoolgirl. 
 
He was shorter, overweight, and would make an eraser head 
look sharp, but along with all of these things, he was the 
master of making her smile and fret – eventually, he would 
prove himself the master of her tears as well.
 
But! Melanie was in fact way too good for this man and 
everyone had been telling her that all along including me. 
 
They were that sort of a couple where people would look at 
them and wonder – “What did this man have to do to have a 
gorgeous woman like that by his side”. 
 
Even our mutual friends usually had the same reaction when 
they saw Melanie and that man together in public: “How did a 
guy like him actually end up with a woman as beautiful as 
that?”
 
Plain and simple, even her boyfriend knew that he was 
massively lucky to have someone like Melanie in his life. 
 
But they definitely had the right kind of understanding required 
to make a relationship thrive. They had the chemistry and the 
stability to stay with one another for longer than some people 
are even capable of remaining married.
 
10
At the end of the day, in spite of what people would perceive as 
their physical attractiveness imbalance, there was no doubting 
that it appeared as if they had that something that could make 
it work.
 
Okay, now coming back to the subject at hand…
 
Over the next few days, Melanie got back in touch with me with
some really disturbing details. 
 
She extracted a lot of information on this new mystery woman 
who had stolen her beloved boyfriend and the details were 
shocking. 
 
Why was it shocking you ask? Well, because this so called 
mystery woman…
 
Didn’t look that remarkable, didn’t have the stability Melanie 
offered & was going through many issues which are too messy 
to describe in one book. 
 
 
The first thing to understand is the most visible aspect – this 
woman was not more attractive than Melanie by any stretch of 
the imagination. 
 
When I finally got a look at her, I immediately came to 
conclusion that she was decidedly the most plain-looking 
woman I’d seen in a very long time.
 
Despite being nothing close to a head-turner, she had managed 
to turn Melanie’s boyfriend’s head far enough away from 
Melanie to capture him completely within her field.
11
 
At this point you might be thinking that the critical factor must 
have been some kind of personality trait the woman possessed 
that won out in the end, but not even this was the case.
 
As a matter of fact, from that Melanie told me, this plain-
looking woman’s personality was messy, unpredictable and she 
was known to have “DRAMA ISSUES”.
 
The more I heard, the more it started to sound like this woman 
had actually made it mission to see just how many undesirable 
traits she could rack up and still be capable of stealing another 
woman’s man away. 
 
This woman had the deadly trifecta of moodiness, 
unpredictability, and a string of past broken relationships that 
had all ended similarly and badly.
 
I thought that getting more information about the woman that 
stole Melanie’s man away would make things just a tad bit 
easier to understand, but instead, it seemed as though the 
more I learned, the more confusing things got. 
 
But after many years of research, I was finally able to identify 
the core psychological components that contained the answer to
every relationship issue. 
 
And that is something which has inspired me to write this book 
for you. 
 
All this time Melanie and I couldn’t quite put a finger on why 
her boyfriend would leave a completely secure, successful and 
pleasurable relationship for a woman who was completely 
messed up and not even as attractive as Melanie. 
12
 
But after my research I discovered the truth and it was this – 
Feelings don’t have eyes! They don’t occur based on what a 
person looks like. 
 
So the false idea that this “Mystery Woman” wasn’t as attractive
as Melanie went straight out of the window & into the trash can 
because in reality, looks don’t count that much to a man. 
 
When it comes to feelings, the things that can actually be 
physically observed are not as relevant as people think – 
contrary to what we may like to believe, feelings do not have 
eyes. 
 
The phrase “love is blind” may be cliché, but it’s cliché for no 
other reason than the fact that it’s based in truth. 
 
Attraction is blind too. 
 
No matter how much we might train ourselves to deny the 
truth, we simply can’t ever consciously choose who we are 
attracted to – on the opposite side of the same coin, we can’t 
force ourselves to not be attracted to a person either, even if we
make every effort to ensure that we don’t. 
 
Now to be completely honest, physical looks are a factor when 
it comes to the degree to which another person can attract us 
or the degree to which we can attract another person.
 
The issue with this line of thought, however, is that people 
severely overestimate the impact of looks alone.
 
While looks do have a measurable effect on the art of 
attraction, the true effect of those looks is only about five 
13
percent. 
 
The other ninety-fivepercent of attraction that we have to 
concern ourselves with, which most people make the mistake of
overlooking, is communication. 
 
Believe it or not, our words and the ways we deliver them have 
the kind of weight that simply looking good can’t hold a candle 
to beyond a first impression. 
 
When I got to thinking about how important genuine 
communication is when it comes to creating a relationship that 
can legitimately last, the truth behind what had spelled the 
death of Melanie’s relationship became much clearer than it had
been before. 
 
The way that the mystery woman had been able to steal away 
Melanie’s man had absolutely nothing to do with anything about
her physical appearance in the slightest – that would be the 
ideally easy explanation, but in truth, there was something 
much more intimate at work behind the scenes. 
 
What had really attracted Melanie’s man to the mystery woman 
was actually nothing more than the way she had been able to 
communicate with the man.
 
Melanie, as can be testified by many people other than myself, 
was the kind of woman that you could see just about any man 
giving more than an arm and leg to be with. But these personal 
qualities, however, only ever really go so far. 
 
Physical looks can only do so much for you, but, the way that 
you communicate carries massive amount of importance.
 
14
Here is what I further discovered in my research…
 
With just the right word uttered at the right time, a chemical 
process takes place in the male mind which can make him find 
a woman 10 to 20 times more attractive than she currently is. 
 
Very few women recognize just how powerful this chemical 
reaction can be, and yet at the same time, it affects almost 
every one of us, every single day.
 
Melanie may have grabbed her man’s attention once with her 
charming personality and amazing looks, but that still wasn’t 
enough to prevent this man from getting attracted to someone 
else. 
 
As weird as this sounds, we live in a society which is obsessed 
with “Physical Attraction” but no one ever talks about “Verbal 
Attraction”. 
 
Honestly, here is my personal promise to you…
If you can learn how to master the art of using words to trigger 
attraction, you’ll be able to stand head over shoulders above 
other women who don’t have a clue of how effective such a 
method can be.
 
Let’s just take a look at how many seemingly perfect 
relationships that gorgeous women like Melanie get involved in 
that wind up dissolving out of nowhere – if looks alone were 
enough to cement loyalty, wouldn’t these sudden breakups 
happen a lot less often?
 
We all want to be loved by the men of our dreams, but 
unfortunately, a lot of us end up resorting to a temporary 
solution to lifelong matter – looking good will only get you so 
15
far. 
 
I can’t tell you how many other women I’ve counseled who 
have wound up getting themselves set up for failure by 
committing based on a momentary infatuation that mistook for 
the real deal.
 
When I realized these secrets, I finally understood how Melanie 
had fallen for a guy who seemed so outwardly low on the shelf 
as the man who left her – it was the impact of his words that 
set her up on the wild ride to abandonment.
 
You don’t need to be in a relationship to savor the benefits of 
just being a physically attractive catch, but if you want to the 
benefits of legitimate commitment, you’ve got to be able to 
make impact on a level that transcends beyond what can be 
surveyed with the eyes.
 
Now while using the power of words can certainly help you get 
a leg up on the competition, the power of this technique also 
makes apparent the massive potential there is to screw your 
chances if you use your words poorly.
 
Here’s the ironic thing about human communication – while it’s 
something that colors just about every aspect of our modern 
lives, every second of the day, lots of us are spectacularly bad 
at accurately expressing how we feel when people say certain 
things in passing. 
 
How often have you ever been offended by a person but smiled 
through your teeth to keep things from seeming awkward for 
everyone around you? Even if you don’t do that yourself, it’s 
how most people compensate for not being emotionally 
transparent, which in some scenarios, can be downright 
practical.
16
Knowing this, it’s imperative to understand that everything you 
say to a man can have massive effects that go completely 
unseen on the surface, sometimes without even so much as a 
facial twitch. 
With how subtle and powerful your words can be, accepting the 
influential power of words endows you with both extreme 
capability and also extreme responsibility – play the game 
correctly and you’ll get everything you wanted, but neglect the 
vital signs and you’ll be left sitting out in the cold in no time.
As a disclaimer, I’ve got to let you know that this book will only 
be as effective as your motivation to honestly apply everything 
that you take away from it. 
If you can make a honest and unshakeable pledge to genuinely 
absorb and emanate the sentiment of what I share with you 
here in this book, it will almost feel as though you’ve been 
transported to an entirely new dimension of your love life. 
Something else that’s vital to take away from this is the equally 
powerful twinborn partner of words – action. 
Words set the stage for success before show time, and after 
that, your actions will bring forth the full power of what you’ve 
set into place. Make sure to honestly apply everything you learn
here with as much consistent action as you can, and you’ll be 
on your way to easy street in no time flat.
Melanie hadn’t explicitly done any one thing wrong, but in truth,
it was what she didn’t do that spelled trouble for her in the end.
She never took into account that communication with her 
partner could shed light on the status of her relationship in a 
way that easily discernible outward confirmations of romance 
never actually could, and because of that, she wound up getting
caught off-guard in the most undesirable sort of way.
17
It’s not to say that communication alone is going to make an 
inherently destructive relationship suddenly work, but noticing 
the power it has to influence the chemistry of you and your 
partner will enlighten you to all kinds of other signs that things 
may or may not be slipping out of the safe zone. 
You will become attuned to the signs that your partner may be 
seeking out a deeper connection with someone else, which is an
absolutely invaluable security measure. Now that we’ve covered
the basic foundation for what you’re going to be learning, it’s 
time to get down to the first chapter!
 
18
Chapter 1 – Understanding the Male Mental
Theater.
 
In my line of work, I’ve coached a small group of women who 
are each in need of the answer to a very understandable 
question that millions of women across the country have 
probably asked themselves at one point or another: 
 
How is it possible for simple words to make a man 
actually fall in love with someone?
 
Some of these women even wonder what makes simple words 
capable of swaying the feelings of man to make him like them 
even more than he does at the current point in time (or 
doesn’t). 
 
The answer to this question can be found in the bare bones 
makeup of human psychology. 
 
You don’t need to be a licensed neurologist in order to 
understand the basic principles that make the human brain 
especially susceptible to being influenced by the spoken word.
 
Before we’re even familiar with what words even are,our 
perspective of the world around us is being molded by 
constantly hearing them. 
 
We learn to use words as mediators between what we desire 
and what we can feasibly achieve, based in part on the people 
around us who are also pursuing and expressing their own 
interests with words. 
19
 
Knowing how deeply ingrained the power of words are in the 
foundation of all of our vastly different societies, our status as 
the human race, and as members of the animal kingdom, it 
should come as no surprise how powerful words can be in the 
world of romance.
 
Here’s one of the most important things that you need to 
understand about how words are able to leave a lasting impact 
on the minds of people who hear them: 
The auditory element of hearing is only a means to an end, but 
what’s most important is the image that the sounds of the 
words create when you process the meaning itself. 
 
In short, every time you hear a word, your mind turns that 
word into a mental image which you see in the theatre of your 
brain. 
 
People oftentimes make the mistake of thinking that it’s the 
tone of the words that we speak or the way in which we deliver 
them that has all of the importance, but that’s really only 
scratching the surface of the complete truth. 
 
The cause of the importance of things like tone and delivery is 
where we must direct the full extent of our attention, and that 
cause is related to images.
 
Two identical phrases, simply uttered in subtly different ways, 
can create entirely different mental images for the person that 
those phrases are directed towards.
 
Think about what the purpose of the first page of a newspaper 
is – it’s to catch your attention as effectively as possible with 
three things:
20
 
1.   Heavily-emboldened font
2.   A significantly blown-up picture 
3.   Hard-hitting words. 
 
These three elements all share something in common in how 
effectively they can command your attention when you’re 
presented with them – each of them are made to appeal to the 
parts of your brain that process images.
 
The dark font and significant size of the headline text 
immediately catches your eye, the heavily emphasized photo 
sends you right into the heart of the action, the imagery of the 
strong words increases the level of immersion into the content.
 
For the sake of only getting you to read something, the front 
page of the newspaper attacks your image-processing faculties 
from multiple angles simultaneously – this is done for a reason 
that hasn’t changed since the dawn of man. 
 
Our ability to perceive the world around us and construct 
hypothetical situations before we act is based on creating 
images. 
 
When you know that the cognitive process of developing a 
mental narrative is based on the construction of and immersion 
within images, you can understand what’s happening on a 
molecular level any time that you’re conversing with another 
human being – it’s a constant flow of imagined visual stimuli.
 
In simple terms, every conversation you have with another 
human being is an exchange of mental images. 
 
21
Now let’s just imagine that we’re having a conversation, and 
eventually I mention that I took my dog to the park for a walk. 
 
Pause and think about that for a minute. 
 
After you heard that sentence, what happened? 
 
Did the line, “I went to the park today to walk my dog” flash in 
your mind as soon as I finished the sentence, or a little bit 
before that? 
 
Or did you actually envision a literal park in your mind that I 
could walk through with a dog on a leash? 
 
If you’re like most people, then you didn’t literally envision the 
words “I went to the park today to walk my dog” sliding across 
an empty space in your mind. 
 
The way that our brains can visually consolidate what isn’t 
immediately observable is why we can accurately describe it as 
an image-processing machine.
 
The beautiful thing about this image-processing machine in our 
heads is that it essentially operates on autopilot. 
 
When you’re engaging in small talk with a cute guy that you 
just met in the coffee shop, everything that you’re saying to 
one another is creating an image that gives you a hypothetical 
representation of what each other’s lives are like – this forms 
the basis for a more significant level of attraction than what 
appearances alone can do.
 
After you’ve just had a lively five minute conversation with the 
22
cute guy at the coffee shop, the volume of mental images that 
were exchanged between the two of you could potentially 
compose a mental narrative that could fill half of an entire epic 
novel.
 
You may not even be consciously aware of all of the vivid 
images that manifest in your mind from hearing just a few 
simple sentences uttered in a particular way.
 
But you see, that’s just the initial step. 
 
Once you hear something and see a mental image of it, your 
mind then respond with adequate “Emotions & Feelings” in 
response to that mental image. 
 
When the emotion is created, the third stage of word-image 
processing begins:  our brain releases a surge of chemicals that
send off alarm systems in the body propelling us to take action.
 
The emotions that you experience when you’re talking to a guy 
that you’re really interested in are literally signs from your body
that are telling you, “Hey! Whatever this guy is doing to you 
right now, I like it! Get more of it!”
 
So if I say to you – “I was crossing the street and had this car 
rushing to meet me at 100 miles per hour”, what happens 
mentally?
 
Chances are that you imagined a car coming to meet you at one
hundred miles per hour, and though it may not necessarily be 
an overwhelming feeling, you might have gotten twinges of 
slight fear as a response. 
 
On a slightly less dramatic scale, let’s look at the times when 
23
someone says something to you that just rubs you the wrong 
way. Have you ever really thought of what it means for 
someone to be rubbed the wrong way? 
 
Being rubbed the wrong way means that even though there 
may not be an immediate or objective explanation for it, 
something about what was communicated created an 
unpleasant sensation.
 
In essence, what has happened with these phrases that rubbed 
us the wrong way is that a negative image was presented to our
brains when the words were processed, and it may be formed 
based on past experiences or personal feelings. 
 
Even though the words may not have been intended as insulting
or even objectively negative, at the end of the day, only the 
image summoned in the mind of the listener matters.
 
Once again, in simpler terms, certain words have more of an 
emotional impact than others and that’s exactly what you’ll 
learn when I share my “Obsession Phrases” with you. 
 
However, before I get to all that, I need to further explain that 
in our studies of somatosensory sensation (how our body 
responds to stimuli), we have discovered that different 
emotions actually do physically register in different areas in the 
body when you’re experiencing them. 
 
When you’re experiencing fear, that uncertainty will literally be 
creating a tugging sensation in the middle your chest or in the 
lowest pit of your belly.
 
Understanding this, it may make a little bit more sense that 
words could have as much influence over a person as I’m telling
24
you they do. 
 
When words summon strong emotions in the people who are 
experiencing them, they’re not just being heard or felt – they 
are literally acting upon the person’s biology in a quantifiable, 
scientifically-observable way.
 
So, here is the most important thing I am trying to 
convey with all this scientific explanation…
 
The stronger the image that gets created by the words that are 
spoken, the more intense the somatosensory experience of 
hearing them is going to be. 
 
A person could feel fear, desire & even love based on how 
powerful your words are. 
 
Now do you understand where I’m going with this?
 
When it comes to falling in love, there’s always the concept of 
fantasy that has kept us entrenched in the ebbs and flows of 
endlessly-repeating love stories since the dawn of storytelling. 
 
These ideas of the people we’re getting to know for the first 
time, and the dreams of doing all sorts of hypothetical things 
with them in the future, all of these things are the exact kind of
mental images that we’ve been going over thus far.
 
It’s not really so complicated when you break it down to this 
golden and stupidly simple rule: good images are good, and 
bad images are bad – not exactly the head-scratcher of the 
century, is it? 
 
25
Despite fact of how amazingly simple this is, you wouldn’t 
believe how many women don’t even have the faintest shred of 
understanding about just how incredibly powerful mental 
images are. 
 
Because most women usually stick to most basic words & don’t 
know how to add more punch to their conversations. 
 
Without even having the slightest clue of how badly they’re 
sabotaging themselves, they use no end of weak and negative 
words that create no emotional impact on a man’s mind at best.
 
And consequently, they aren’t able to get the desired result 
from their man. 
 
In fact, here is the kicker…
 
Sometimes a woman who thinks she’s giving off all of the right 
signs could actually be creating an incredibly unpleasant impact
without having any idea about it whatsoever. 
 
Now it’s not to say that none of these clueless women are ever 
able to get into stable relationships – quite the contrary. 
 
The problem is however, that these women struggle day in and 
day out to get what they want from their man. 
 
Since they fail to take note of the subtle but powerful effects of 
their own words, theirs is a life of endless confusion and 
struggles with relationship issues that appear to have come 
completely out of left field, without warning. 
 
If you can learn how to see past the smallness of individual 
26
words and phrases and recognize how some words can get you 
literally anything you want from a man…
 
You’ll have slightly better protection against getting blindsided 
by unexpected inconsistencies in the ways that a man acts 
around you. 
 
Let’s just look at it is this way: consider the impact that 
marketing has in the first world. The concept of buying and 
selling encapsulates our society so completely that it’s what 
many people identify as the foundation of their entire reality.
 
Now consider the fact that simple words, and words alone, 
carry the power to sell a product. 
 
With nothing more than words creating an image in your mind 
relevant to the use of the product, you are compelled to go out 
and exchange a real piece of your livelihood for the chance of 
realizing that hypothetical experience relating to the product in 
your mind. 
 
We could spend many days breaking into psychological 
consumer complexities, but that’s for another day. 
At this point, you now understand the key basics of how words 
function in our communicative world. 
 
You know how words trigger certain images and feelings in our 
minds to construct a vivid mental narrative that frames our 
grasp on reality and the people around us. 
 
So how do you use this basic knowledge in regards to 
men and making them fall in love? 
 
27
It is now that we’re going to start putting together the most 
important part of the puzzle.
 
Are you ready? 
 
The best way that you can get a man to love you to the point of
just about worshipping you is by using special kinds of words 
that can fulfill some of his deepest desires. 
 
The kinds of desires that you’ll be tapping into will be sort that 
he goes through most of his day having largely unfulfilled, due 
to how much he probably keeps them under wraps on a daily 
basis. 
 
Let’s get this out of the way before we go any further: 
 
But when I say “Deepest Male Desires”, some of you ladies are 
probably thinking that you already have the answer. 
 
Some of you might being thinking, “Oh! Sex, obviously! I 
already knew that before I started reading this.”
 
Here’s the deal: that line of thinking is only a little bit right, but 
mostly off-base. Sex does account for a part of the equation, 
but in the grand scheme of things, it’s only useful for solving 
about one percent of the entire puzzle. 
 
When you’re ready to start working on the other ninety-nine 
percent of the puzzle, you’re going to have to move on past the
sex aspect. 
 
Now before we break down into the meat of what I want to 
share with you here today, we’ve got to make sure that 
28
something is understood before moving on even a step further. 
 
We have to outline what the truth of the matter is with women 
who are only desired by their men for sex and little else.
 
The truth is that when a man desires you for nothing other than
what you can offer him sexually, it means that at some point, 
you were not able to fulfill him in some department of his 
desires.
 
Now that may not be something you’d like to hear, but I urge 
you to not take personal offense to it – it doesn’t always mean 
that it was your fault. 
 
In sharing with you what I am about to reveal, you’re going to 
know how to properly gauge a man’s desires before getting in 
too deep to understand exactly what it is that he’s interested in 
experiencing with you.
 
When you fully understand what a man desires from you, you 
will be much more capable of getting into the kind of 
relationship in which you will realistically be able to have mutual
satisfaction with a man who is right for you.
 
Now before we get too off-topic, let’s return to the concept of 
the ninety-nine percent that I mentioned earlier, with sex 
composing only the remaining one percent. 
 
The ninety-nine percent is what ninety-nine percent of women 
completely miss. 
 
The thing swooping under these women’s radars is the nature of
what their words have to be communicating in order to create 
positive mental images for their men that are congruent with 
29
their desires, and that is what I’m going to help you with here 
today. 
 
So taking sex off the picture, here are some of the most vital 
male desires you must be aware of before you star using my 
“Obsession Phrases”. 
 
The first desire that you’ve got to nail down is the desire for 
approval.
 
Male Desire Number One – He Needs Your Approval and 
Validation
 
Have you ever heard something to the effect of, “everyone is 
walking around with an empty cup and expecting someone else 
to fill it?”
 
Believe it or not, this saying is extremely true when it comes to 
even the most independent men in our lives. 
 
Approval and comfort are what they desire from women in 
general. 
 
A man will build an entire empire to hide this fact inside of, but 
at the same time, he is helpless to escape the fact that does 
desire to feel validated.
 
The man, no matter how secure and cool and confident he 
appears, is in constant search of something in the form of 
approval. 
 
He desires the validation because all of us, as human beings, 
are intrinsically validation-seeking beings. 
30
 
Every man is seeking out some form of approval from a female 
figure from an early stage in childhood, and oftentimes, it 
begins with the mother. 
 
Everything we do is, in a way, based on seeking out positive 
reinforcement through the things that we enjoy. 
 
Just like you probably have, I’ve heard a lot in my life about 
how it is selfish to seek out validation from others and how the 
best thing to do is to make sure that we’re always secure 
enough in our own skin to be content without anyone’s approval
at all.
 
Even though it may be unhealthy to need approval on the same
level that an addict seeks out their fix through alcohol or 
nicotine or painkillers, simply desiring some form of approval is 
completely natural and nothing to be ashamed of. 
 
Men crave approval from women to the degree that you likely 
have several men right now who want to feel like heroes in 
front of you. 
 
The man wants you to be grateful for the fact that he is a 
constant presence in your life, and for that to happen, he needs
you to have an honest understanding of who and what he is. 
 
After you understand exactly what it is that defines him and 
how much he wants you to desire him, your choice is whether 
or not you make an attempt at fulfilling that desire yourself.
 
If you can fulfill all of his desires to feel needed and 
appreciated, he’s going to feel like the two of you are 
legitimately meant for one another. 
31
 
He’s going to want to seek you out due to the fact that you give
him a feeling that no other woman can manage. 
 
Now let’s move onto the second desire that needs to be 
fulfilled…
 
Male Desire Number Two – He wants you to 
unconditionally respect him
 
Now this is far from being the easiest thing to do, but if you can
pull it off, you’ll be accomplishing something that a lot of 
women really tend to struggle with accepting.
 
If you want to fulfill this desire, then the only way to do it is to 
see your man as someone who is truly deserving of 
unconditional respect. 
Because so many women wind up getting into relationships with
men who are not worthy of respect, however, this can be a very
difficult subject to explain with them.
 
Unconditional respect is not only impossible if your man 
objectively doesn’t deserve it, but also if you don’t even truly 
believe that your man actually deserves the respect in the very 
first place.
 
Be aware that there is a very good reason that I chose to use 
the term unconditional respect. To just about every man that 
you can imagine, respect is the single most valuable thing. 
 
In a world where we’re scarcely able to unconditionally hold 
onto our own belongings or the people closest to us, 
unconditional self-respect is one of the few things that a lot of 
men feel some sense of security in owning, and they like people
32
around them to acknowledge that.
 
The universal inner desire for respect makes it so that the very 
moment you acknowledge his effort, he’s going to respond 
positively. If you acknowledge him consistently enough, then 
eventually, it’s possible for him to return it with love.
 
If your man doesn’t feel respected at all, though, then clearly 
the two of you are going to have some serious challenges. If he 
feels outright disrespected by you, then all of his attraction, 
attention and feelings of desire for you are going to hit the 
ground before you know it.
 
As respect is one of the principal things that a man holds dear, 
there are few things that he despises more than the feeling of 
being disrespected. What’s more is that you will rarely ever 
actually have a man overtly verbalize when he feels that you’ve 
disrespected him. 
 
Chances are that if a man really feels like you’ve disrespected 
him, what he’s most likely to do is actually just slowly break off 
contact until he’s completely absent. 
 
If you aren’t attentive enough, you won’t have any idea where 
things went wrong when he’s completely withdrawn.
 
Now that you know how to avoid the worst case scenario by 
making sure to maintain a consistent level of respect, it’s time 
to move onto the third key point.
 
Male Desire Number Three – Raising a Man’s Emotional 
Temperature
 
When it comes to maintaining a steady and powerful 
33
relationship with a man over an extended period of time, you 
can consider it like keeping a small flame fanned and active. 
 
If you fan it too hard, it will die out, but neglecting to tend to it 
will make it lose its luster as well. We’re going to refer to this as
raising a man’s emotional temperature, and by extension, the 
art of maintaining it as well. 
 
To put it in the simplest terms, you have to learn how to “tune 
up” all of the latent emotions that your man experiences when 
you’re in his presence. The greater that his emotional intensity 
is when he’s around you, the more intense the physiological 
symptoms will be in turn. 
 
When his emotions are legitimately clawing at him from the 
inside to make him think about you on a consistent basis, he’s 
going to be desiring your presence on a level that transcends 
what is purely emotional and legitimately approaches physical 
symptomology. 
 
You are literally going to become a kind of “fix” that he seeks in 
order to feel more at ease.
 
In order to even reach the point of having your man actually 
want you to this degree, you’ve got to raise his emotional 
temperature to the point of no return. 
 
All of the feelings that are conducive to attraction are going to 
be over clocked, and when this happens, you’ve essentially got 
the system working in your favor on autopilot.
 
It’s going to be such a powerful effect that he himself may not 
even be fully aware of why he’s as attracted to you as he is, but
there will be no denying that he’ll be consumed by an 
34
unshakeable and mysterious magnetism towards you. 
 
Essentially, there are going to be three key events that occur 
after his emotional temperature has reached a serious boiling 
point:
 
1.   He will Find Himself in the Zone of Consistent 
Attraction
 
Simply by raising the emotional temperature to optimal levels, 
you’ve left a legitimate carbon footprint on his physiological 
composition. 
 
He’s going to feel a level of attraction to you ingrained so 
squarely and deeply in his heart that it will feel to him like his 
soul is legitimately dancing in excitement at the simple prospect
of being able to spend more time with you in the near future.
 
Whenever he thinks about you, he’s going to feel the 
inescapable tug of his feelings towards you in the pit of his 
stomach. 
 
You’ll notice that when he actually sees you, he’ll be exhibiting 
signs of wanting to be physically closer to you if it’s at all 
possible.
 
He’s going to be experiencing ripples of immense comfort 
around you and the concept of your person, and when this 
happens, he’s going to be both relaxed and anxious – it will be 
the dual effect of a simultaneous push and pull that both work 
to bring him closer to your position. 
 
2.   He Will Feel Emotionally Safe in Your Presence
 
35
You may or may not be aware of it, but just the concept of 
emotionality is a very touchy thing for the average man to 
come to terms with. 
 
While it doesn’t mean that he’ll actually feel things less, it 
means he’s got to deal with the pressure of not revealing his 
susceptibility to emotional fluctuations too often, lest he 
compromise the masculine “image” society holds him to.
 
When you’ve personally raised up the emotional temperature to
a suitable level, however, you will have managed to become a 
legitimate emotional safe zone for him that he can go to 
without fear of being judged or insulted. 
 
All in all, your presence is going to summon within him an 
extraordinary amount of relief and safety that he’ll find 
particularly valuable in his everyday life.
 
Whenever he knows that you’re nearby, he’ll feel relief from the
cloud of uneasiness that may have formerly shrouded him any 
time that he thought about the horror stories and sacrifices of 
commitment.
 
You absolutely cannot neglect to understand just how much 
men value their personal freedoms. 
 
Freedom is probably one of the few thing that come close to 
respect when it comes to what a man values among all things in
general, and when he senses that a life with you isn’t going to 
stifle or restrict him, he’ll be a lot more at ease with you than 
most other women.
 
Number Three – He Will Not Grow Bored
 
36
Men hate monotony as much as they love the feeling of 
freedom, and so naturally, their worst nightmare is to feel like 
they’re trapped in a boring life spent with a woman who drains 
all of the high-octane pleasure and spontaneity out of his 
existence.
 
When you’re able to summon intense physiological symptoms 
within him that raise his heart rate, you can guarantee that he 
won’t feel the slightest thing resembling boredom when it 
comes to your presence. 
 
You’ll be able to raise his emotional temperature so effectively 
that it will actually seem nearly impossible for him to be bored 
in your presence, because he will have essentially been 
psychologically conditioned to be excited at the prospect of 
spending time with you whenever possible.
 
Putting it All Together
 
You now understand the three crucial keys to raising a man’s 
emotional temperature to a boiling point. 
 
1. He’s going to feel like he has the freedom to be emotionally 
uninhibited with you, in stark contrast to how he has to conduct
himself in everyday settings. 
 
2. He’s going to feel emotionally safe in your presence, turning 
every conversation into a valuable zone of security that he’ll be 
extremely hesitant to let another man encroach upon. 
 
3. He’s going to be so constantly stimulated by the way that 
you can bring his male mental theater to life that he’ll never 
grow bored with you, which will make him consider life with you
like an adventure that’s waiting to happen as soon as he 
37
becomes bold enough to embark. 
 
Accompanying these highly desirable effects of dedicating 
attention to raising his emotional temperature are the benefits 
of fulfilling two other extremely important desires he possesses 
– the desire to be unconditionally respected, and the desire to 
be validated.
 
When he feels that you respect him for the essence of all that 
he is, he’ll feel a certain kind of compulsion to be near you that 
can’t possibly be matched just by seeing another lady in the 
store who’s physically attractive.
 
You’re going to be triggering all of these momentous effects 
simply with the use of powerful words which I call “Obsession 
Phrases”. 
 
Everything that we’ve discussed so far may sound a bit 
complex, but the beauty of it all is that the complexity is 
underlined by extraordinarily simple precedents. 
 
With just the utterance of a well-time or thought-out phrase, 
you can set off the chain reaction within a man that leads him 
on the path to seeing you in a light that few other women in his
life have the knowledge to match.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
38
 
Chapter 2 – The Big Secret of Obsession
Phrases.
 
Have you ever been so engrossed in a movie or book that you 
started actually feeling like you were experiencing that fictional 
story yourself? 
 
Has the immersion ever been so great that you can’t help but 
actually feel as though you personally understand the pain and 
happiness that the characters are experiencing? 
 
Have the ebbs and flows of a protagonist’s struggles ever 
managed to take you on a very real emotional journey yourself?
 
Have you ever been so immersed in a fictional story that you 
feel just a little bit empty when the story is over, like a piece of 
your own story has come to an end? 
 
When you become invested enough in a fictional work to feel 
like you’re truly apart of the action, then the creator has 
accomplished their mission. 
 
What do you think Hollywood is really profiting off of? 
 
Does Hollywood profit from high-profile actors and special 
effects? 
 
39
If you said so, you wouldn’t be wrong, but you wouldn’t be one 
hundred percent right, either – what Hollywood really uses 
those actors and special effects for is to profit from yours and 
others’ emotions.
 
People see movies for all kinds of reasons, from the want of 
laughter even to moral obligation, but at the end of the day, 
those motivations are unified by the element of emotional 
investment that has to happen first. 
 
When you are buying a cinema ticket, or a soft cover pulp 
fiction novel, or admission to the cinema, what you are really 
purchasing is the experience of your own resultant emotions to 
the content.
 
It may seem a bit odd that you could actually buy the 
experience of your own emotions, but don’t get too caught up 
in the face-value of the words – technically your emotions are 
already there, and what you purchase is the entertainment 
medium to serve as a temporary conduit for all of your feelings.
 
 
Your joy, your excitement, and your fear are all things that 
Hollywood and other professionals in the creative medium are 
monetizing. 
 
When the production fails to make the audience feel anything 
that’s conducive to engaging in it more, then that’s when it fails
to sell and gets considered a flop. 
 
Even an emotional investment based in anger counts as a 
victory for Hollywood if it results in more people purchasing the 
opportunity to see what all the fuss is about.
 
40
Now hold on, why am I talking about movies so much? 
 
You may be wondering why I’m going on about movies when 
this is supposed to be a book about obsession phrases, but if 
you’ve been paying strict attention to what we’ve covered in the
previous chapter, you probably know what the point is.
 
What you’re going to learn has to do with taking a page from 
Hollywood in the art of knowing how to effectively “”STIR 
EMOTIONS” within people that you want to influence.
 
Here’s something interesting to know about emotions – we are 
far, far more likely to mentally consolidate an event in our 
memory when it’s emotionally charged. 
 
Even if we don’t remember every detail, if it’s emotionally 
charged, it will be branded into our memory and stick out like a 
red-hot piece of iron in the snow.
 
We experience so many diverse sounds, sights and smells on a 
daily basis that it would be absolutely impossible to manually 
account for them all without going stir crazy. 
 
Our brains unburden themselves of the weight of insignificant 
memories of under-stimulating things for a reason – we have 
absolutely no use for them, and so it’s only practical to toss 
them to the side. 
 
A human is actually about ten times more likely to remember 
an emotionally-charged event than an event in which they had 
no emotional investment at all. 
 
Bland and boring events get discarded in the static of all of the 
rest of our disregarded memories, but emotionally electric 
41
events get moved to special shelf in which they can always be 
viewed more clearly.
 
Think of how people argue with their significant others, or how 
parents argue with their children, and the frequent accusation 
that somebody never does X, Y, or Z. Now X, Y, or Z could be 
something as innocuous as taking out the trash or doing the 
dishes, and it’s extremely unlikely that anyone has ever literally
never done those things at least one time.
 
The emotionally charged heat of the argument simply 
superimposes the negative memories of when the other person 
being argued with didn’t happen to do whatever that chore was.
 
Essentially, we’re going to be accomplishing the same thing with
obsession phrases that Hollywood professionals and best-selling
author can accomplish with their emotion-eliciting work. 
 
If you can learn how to make your words contribute to a 
strongly consolidated memory by imbuing them with 
emotionally triggering power, you can make the impression you 
want on the man you desire. 
 
Now something vital to remember here is that the emotions 
you’re looking to stir up in the man, in relation to you, should 
be positive ones. 
 
While a documentary can attract viewers based on the fact that 
it triggers their righteous anger, that’s not an emotion that’s 
highly conducive to a person wanting to a man wanting to 
spend more time with you. 
 
The obsession phrases we’re going to be covering are designed 
to stir up emotion to maximum velocity. 
42
 
The goal seems simple enough on paper, but you might be 
wondering exactly how it is you can most successfully go about 
stirring up emotion in the very first place – no need to fear, 
because I’ve broken it down into three essential steps.
 
Remember, the amount of emotion you’re able to summon 
within the man’s heart and the level of benefits you’ll be able to
derive from the relationship with him are positively correlated. 
 
So here are the details you must keep in mind before you say 
anything to a man…
 
1.   Show, don’t tell. 
2.   Make his mind ponder. 
3.   Create anticipation.
 
If you can fully consolidate the values of these three different 
steps into an overarching attitude you adopt towards speaking 
to a man, you’ll have the key to getting just about everything 
you desire from him
 
 
1. Show, don’t tell. Details are necessary.
 
A golden rule of this process is to make sure that you prioritize 
the mental images created by the words you speak instead of 
simply the words themselves. 
 
As we emphasized a great deal in the past chapter, it’s not 
really the words themselves that carry any intrinsic value when 
we speak them – all we ever did when we created language was
ascribe meaning to sounds, and the impact of the sound is 
43
determined by the mental image formulated in the mind of the 
hearer.
 
If you really want to strike a nerve in the heart of any man, 
then the principle of showing and not telling cannot be 
overstated in its importance. 
 
Every single one of your words should paint a vivid portrait in 
the man’s mind that keeps him up at night. 
 
There are millions of ways that you can paint a vivid picture in a
man’s mind, and so understandably, it can be a tad bit 
intimidating to try and think of every single possibility – one 
thing that you assuredly can do, however, is make sure that 
your words aren’t boring or mundane. 
 
Unfortunately, most people in society are fine-tuned to 
constantly speak of the most inane and boring things 
imaginable – on top of that, they oftentimes repeat these 
boring things over and over again.  
 
Here’s an example that just might illustrate the principle a little 
bit more clearly. 
 
You could very easily tell a guy something as honest and simple
as, “Hey! I like you!” 
 
It accomplishes the basic purpose, but you can definitely do a 
lot better than that. 
 
If you really want to knock it out of the park, you’ve got to 
make a point of going out of your way to make sure he 
understands exactly what kinds of things he does that you like. 
 
44
Instead of just telling him that you like him and leaving it at 
that, what you can do is say something more to this effect:
 
“I really like it when you hold my hands and hold me really 
close to you, it makes me feel so wonderful.”
 
Doesn’t the difference strike you immediately? 
 
The added imagery here really drives it home that you’re not 
just trying to make him think that you like him. 
 
By adding in a specific account of exactly what it is he does that
makes you feel great, you’ve given a high-quality mental image
to work with and understand more of your mental narrative. 
 
Remember: the more detailed the mental image you can paint 
in his mind, the heavier of an impact you’ll be able to make on 
his mind when you’re no longer in the immediate vicinity. 
 
When you can get him to think about you even when you’re not
actually around him, you’ll know that you’ve finally succeeded 
in painting a powerful mental image in his psyche that will 
gradually drive him wild with affection for you.
 
 
2. Make his mind ponder
 
The second extremely important principle of emotional 
stimulation we’re going to cover here is the art of heavy mental
stimulation. 
 
One of the best ways that you can see to it that a man gets 
emotional is by making it so that he has to wrestle with his own
45
uncertainty. 
 
Men love to be right, and so when you don’t allow them to have
everything figured out right away, they’re naturally going to 
start feeling a little bit out of sorts about things.
 
Your objective must be to force the man to think, consider, 
ponder and internally question just about everything that you 
say to him. 
 
You don’t have to make it so that you’re outright lying to him or
saying weird things, but a real effort to leave loose ends 
attached to the things you say will go a long way. 
 
Most conversations are boring by default, which is why the most
exciting and thought-provoking conversations we have tend to 
stand out so much in our minds when we have them. 
 
When we’re able to have a conversation that really leaves us 
questioning what is and isn’t true, we hold it in special place in 
our minds for analysis until it’s solved, if it ever is.
 
Let’s just use an easy example to illustrate the effect I’m talking
about here…
 
Suppose you want to let a guy know that you like spending time
with him, but don’t want to make it seem like he’s won you just 
because he’ made a good impression so far. 
 
You could say something to the effect of, “Hey Eric, I enjoy your
company” and be done with it, or you could take a step farther 
in order to really engage his curious mind at a level that you 
haven’t touched before. 
 
46
Instead of just telling him that you enjoy his company, you can 
both express your appreciation for while still allowing for some 
shadow of a doubt. 
 
Say something like – “I enjoy your company a lot but you do 
have your weird moments once in a while…”
 
Now do you see what the critical difference is here with the 
latter form of the phrase? 
 
Instead of just leaving your statement of appreciation for him 
hanging in the air so that he can take it and use to inflate his 
ego, you’ve instead given him something that he can 
legitimately think about.
 
The first sentence barely requires any thought at all on his part 
to understand. Even though it may be true that you do enjoy 
his company enough to express it to him honestly, it’s an 
incredibly bland statement that he won’t have to roll over in his 
head for very long in order to fully understand. 
 
With the second statement, you have effectively opened up the 
virtual floodgates for his thoughts. 
He would be completely caught up in wondering about what 
your definition of “weird moments” is, growing increasingly self-
conscious. 
 
When he starts thinking critically about all of the things he does
that could possibly be interpreted by you as weird, you’ve 
initiated the loop of constant conversation he’ll engage in with 
you in order to find out.
 
You’ll get a better understanding of this when you see some of 
the “Obsession Phrases” in the coming chapters. 
47
 
3 – Create anticipation
 
Now this third principle of emotional stimulation I’m going to 
share with you is actually the most powerful one of all. 
 
We’ve already gone over how heavily the movie industry 
depends on emotional stimulation in order to stay afloat, and 
now I ask you once again to take a moment to think critically 
about the entertainment industry.
 
Have you ever watched the Daily Soaps? 
 
Have you noticed how Daily Soaps are able to maintain a 
constant audience by ending every episode on an open loop? 
 
What do you think the purpose of that open loop is, exactly?
 
The open loop format is a truly genius approach to the ongoing 
series medium. When each episode ends on an open loop, the 
viewer has their anticipation triggered, which results in a 
nervous brand of excitement.
 
Your primary goal should be to make it so that every time you 
two are about to part ways, there’s always just a little bit of 
uncertainty left hanging in the air for him. 
 
When you make sure to always leave a little bit of mystery 
lingering between the two of you, he’s going to be left 
anticipating what you do and say a lot more than he did before.
 
 
Now it’s crucial that before I dive into the specifics of this step, 
48
I clarify something for you: 
 
While this third step is undoubtedly powerful, it is not always 
absolutely necessary. You should use this technique sparingly 
unless the situation really calls for it. 
 
You don’t always need to create more anticipation, and we’ll 
spend some more time talking about that in coming chapters.
 
Now if there comes the time when you legitimately do feel you 
need to employ the art of creating a sense of anticipation, I’ve 
got an example you can look to for inspiration. 
 
Imagine you’ve just finished a picturesque date with a guy who 
just so happens to do an astoundingly small amount of things 
to tick you off. 
 
You’re feeling a good 8 or 9 out of 10 on the scale of 
satisfaction with the night, and you know that you’ve got to let 
this guy know he’s done an awesome job at salvaging your faith
in the male gender. 
 
You could very well just say something as simple as, “It was 
nice meeting you and I hope to do this again sometime.” and 
leave it at that. 
 
It’s short, simple, sweet, and about as exciting as cleaning the 
lint out of the dryer. 
 
Ending a night out with a line like this may not exactly push him
away, but it’s highly unlikely to have him chomping at the bit to 
come out and see you again. 
 
49
Now if you really want to leave your potential lover off on a 
serious cliffhanger, all that’s needed is a slight adjustment. Try 
to instead say something to the effect, of:
 
“I did enjoy my time with you, but I noticed something a little 
bit strange.”
 
Now after you say something like this, he’s naturally going to 
wonder and be curious about what you thought was “SO 
STRANGE” about a wonderful date.  
 
Now when naturally expresses that curiosity, that’s your cue to 
deliver the graceful coup de grace. 
 
Instead of just letting him know exactly what it is that made 
you think things were a little bit strange, you can instead say 
something to the effect of: 
 
“Oh! I really need to head back home. I’ll talk about it some 
other time.”
 
Now after you utter this last sentence, do you have any idea of 
what might happen next? I’ll tell you: you’re going to end the 
date, right then and there. 
 
Don’t offer any alternative explanation, just head on back to 
where you need to go with a sense of urgency and purpose. 
 
From the very moment you leave, you will have effectively 
summoned a loop of intrigue and uncertainty in his mind that 
he’ll be hard-pressed to escape from. 
 
His anticipation will intermingle with his feeling of uncertainty, 
50
and more than anything else, he’ll want to clarify the truth the 
mystery of your true feelings. 
 
Now to sum this chapter up and put it all on the same page, 
let’s just briefly review all that we’ve covered here thus far 
about these obsession-generating phrases. 
 
Your obsession-generating phrases will at once build up a 
cocktail of comfort and anxiety in his heart – while he’ll be 
relieved that you do have something resembling feelings 
towards him, he’ll also be a bit wary of what the implications of 
your uncertainty are. 
 
The key to creating these effects is really just a matter of 
making the words you say create strong, highly discernible 
images. 
 
You don’t have to literally create fantastic images off of the top 
of your head, but you can benefit simply from taking care to 
make specific mentions of all of the things it is that he does that
please you.
 
Instead of making ambiguous mentions about the kind of 
person you think he is, substitute those things with ambiguous 
mentions about things that might actually be turning you off. 
Never forget that men are, by nature, enamored with the allure 
of the chase. 
 
Everything that we desire is always perceived as most valuable 
when it seems as if it’s the farthest out of our reach, due to the 
aura of exclusivity. 
 
When your phrases compliment him while still giving off the 
impression that your approval is something that he still has to 
51
work for, you’ll be triggering ancient components within him 
that kick start the emotions conducive to pursuing you – 
frustration, happiness, determination, confusion, and obsession.
Once you feel you’ve gotten a good grip on whatever I’ve 
explained thus far, it’s time I share my obsession phrases with 
you one by one. Move on to the next chapter. 
 
 
 
52
End of Trial Chapters...
Obtain the Complete Program:
1
Table of Contents
What is the Venus Factor
 
                                                                                                                             
............................................................................................................................
 
4  
Your New Venus Family........................................................................................................................9
Balance................................................................................................................................................12
Gender Differences In Metabolism
 
                                                                                                           
..........................................................................................................
 
14
  
Size Difference....................................................................................................................................14
Body Composition...............................................................................................................................15
Leptin...................................................................................................................................................18
Nutrition Science
 
                                                                                                                                       
......................................................................................................................................
 
24
  
Eat-Up Days vs Cheat Days................................................................................................................24
Disinhibited Eating – 'Good Food' vs 'Bad Food' Thinking Must Go.................................................27
Hot Button Foods................................................................................................................................30
What Should I eat?..............................................................................................................................31
Soy.......................................................................................................................................................31
Sugar....................................................................................................................................................31
Artificial Sweeteners...........................................................................................................................32
Beverages............................................................................................................................................33
Carbohydrates AKA "Carbs" - 4 calories per gram.............................................................................35
Fats - 9 calories per gram....................................................................................................................36
Protein - 4 calories per gram...............................................................................................................37
Meal Timing and Meal Frequency......................................................................................................38
Ego Depletion......................................................................................................................................40
A special note about coffee..................................................................................................................42
Calories
 
                                                                                                                                                     
....................................................................................................................................................
 
44
  
Deficit vs Maintenance........................................................................................................................44
Metabolic Rates...................................................................................................................................46
Tapering Up Calories...........................................................................................................................49
Weight vs Shape
 
                                                                                                                                        
.......................................................................................................................................
 
51
  
Thinner Isn’t the Only Answer............................................................................................................53
What Determines Your Shape?............................................................................................................54
2
The Golden Proportion........................................................................................................................57
The Venus Index Measurements
 
                                                                                                               
..............................................................................................................
 
59
  
Ideal Waist (Height-to-Waist Ratio)....................................................................................................60
Waist-to-Hip Ratio (WHR)..................................................................................................................63
Shoulder-to-Waist Ratio......................................................................................................................65
How to Take Your Measurements.......................................................................................................67
Venus Index Measurement Example Guide........................................................................................68
Metabolic Flexibility & Adaptability..................................................................................................71
12-Week Undulating Metabolic Override Program
 
                                                                                  
.................................................................................
 
72
  
Weeks 1-2 : 5 & 1 Protocol.................................................................................................................72
Weeks 3-4 : Undulation #1 - High Fat 2&1 protocol..........................................................................72
Weeks 5-6 : 5 & 1 Protocol.................................................................................................................73
Weeks 7-8 : Undulation #2 - High Protein 2&1 Protocol...................................................................73
Weeks 9-10 : 5 & 1 Protocol...............................................................................................................73
Weeks 11-12 : Undulation #3 High Carb 2&1 Protocol......................................................................74
The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist
 
                                                                                                       
......................................................................................................
 
76
  
Using The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist.......................................................................................76
Inputs...................................................................................................................................................77
Outputs................................................................................................................................................78
Supplements 
 
                                                                                                                                            
............................................................................................................................................
 
81
  
References
 
                                                                                                                                                 
................................................................................................................................................
 
84
  
3
What is the Venus Factor
The Venus Factor is a complete weight loss and body re-shaping system. The components that make up 
the entire system are as follows:
1. Main diet and weight loss manual (this document).
2. The 12-week workout system - this includes a library of instructional exercise videos and 
complete 12-week workout system that can be done at home or in a gym.
3. The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist - this is a software app that calculates your specific calorie 
and protein requirements for weight loss specific to your body measurements.
4. The Venus Community - A private online community exclusive for Venus Factor members only. 
 You can meet and learn from other Venus members, start your own personal blog within the 
community, or just browse other members' blogs and forum for information. Your level of 
involvement is your choice.
5. The Venus Index Podcast - Where you can listen to other Venus members tell their weight loss 
success stories. Every year we host 3 transformation contests and I interview all the winners to 
get the real inside story on how they used the Venus Factor system to fit their life and 
challenges to achieve their weight loss and body shape goals. 
Theoretically you can lose all unwanted weight using only the dietary tools you will find here. In other 
words, if you never want to workout you don't really have to. However I rarely recommend this 
approach as your results will be both accelerated and optimized with the addition of physical activity.  
This is why we've included the 12-week Venus Factor workout system for you.
Getting in shape, or rather, changing the size and shape of your body is a two part process.
4
Part 1 is weight loss and fat removal.
This part is almost entirely dictated by your nutrition and diet. You can lose all the weight and fat that 
you want if you have the right dietary approach. This system provides that dietary approach not only to 
lose the fat but also to keep it off. This second point about 'keeping it off' cannot be stressed enough.
Many different diet programs can cause temporary weight loss. However the methods of most diets is 
to 'crash' you into the weight loss, putting your hormonal, psychological, and physical systems out of 
balance which leads to a stalling of weight loss and eventual rebound weight gain. This weight regain 
pushes your system even further out of balance.
We've studied this problem and developed a solution that allows for weight loss without crashing and 
most importantly without the rebound weight gain. This system should be the last one you ever need as 
it's designed to produce as close to permanent weight loss as possible.
Part 2 is body and muscle shaping and toning.
You have a unique body structure and shape that is largely determined by two factors:
i)
the location and amount of fat you have on your body
ii) the shape and size of your muscles
And, while it is true that much of your natural shape comes from your genetics much of the way you 
store fat and build muscle is within your control. 
We've already discussed that the diet portion of this system will be used to remove the fat off of your 
body (nutrition and diet component). The second part of this system is how you can change the shape 
of your body by changing the shape and tone of your muscles (workout component). 
Some people will remove the fat from their body and be perfectly happy with the natural shape and 
tone of their muscles and will not want to, or need to do any exercising for muscle tone or shape. In my 
experience this is less common as most women want to work on certain areas of their body. 
5
The look and shape of your body is entirely within your control to change as you wish. You can take fat 
off where you want, and you can shape and tone any muscles you want. For example many of our past 
successful Venus's have lost all the body fat they wanted to lose, and then turned their focus to working 
on specific muscles to complement their new leaner form. Many found that they wanted to work on 
building their butt, and our program provides the tools to do this. Others find that once they lost their 
weight they needed to work on their shoulders and arms citing that they already had strong firm legs 
but needed their upper body to come into balance. Others still wanted a whole body workout that 
provides balance, shape and muscle tone to their entire figure. All cases can easily be done with this 
program.
Overall the Venus Factor system is designed to be the simplest approach possible to achieving fat loss 
while also providing a workout program for developing and shaping muscle in a manner that is specific 
to a woman's body. A major consideration that went into the production of this program was 
practicality. In other words, this program had to also fit within a busy modern life. I fully believe you 
can have the body you want without having to sacrifice your social life to get it. After all, what would 
be the point of getting into great shape if you can never reap the social benefits of that new shape!?
Too many trainers and fitness coaches teach their clients to treat their diet and workout like a 'second 
job'. Are you kidding me?! I don't even want a 'first job' let alone a second one!
The vast majority of women who want to lose weight simply do not have 6 to 8 extra hours a day to 
dedicate to this endeavour. Heck, for most people even carving out 1 hour takes some rearranging and 
schedule juggling.
6
My view of the Venus Factor is this:
The Venus Factor System is the essential diet and fitness tools you need to get the body you want, 
while still being able to enjoy your life to its fullest.
My goal with this program is to simplify the process rather than overcomplicate it. No doubt if you 
tried other diet or workout programs you already have many different diet and fitness 'rules' floating 
around in your head that you will not see come up in this program. In fact one of your first challenges 
will be accepting how simple this program really is. And I can assure you it's pretty simple.
At this time it's worth making a distinction between 'simple' and 'easy'.
This program just like any other diet or fitness program will have some challenges for you, some won't 
necessarily feel 'easy' but they will be 'simple'. For example, a push up is a 'simple' movement, but it 
may not necessarily feel 'easy' the first time you try it. Likewise eating a bit less sugar or fat is a 
'simple' concept, but it may not feel 'easy' in the moment.
So to be clear I've made this as 'simple' as possible, but sometimes it won't necessarily feel 'easy'.
7
Beth Hill – The Venus Mindset
I do want to offer a huge thank you to YOU! It was discovering YOU 
through MFP that led me to the Venus Index and I haven't looked back. 
You have created such a beautiful transformation and I am simply in awe 
of you! My 12 weeks ends today and I am so thrilled with the changes that 
have occurred in my life - physically, emotionally, and spiritually! 
As a tall woman, my biggest fear was always becoming big and tall. It has 
now happened twice in the recent years and it feels absolutely horrible. At 
this point in my life, I truly don't see it ever happening again. I have no 
reservations and am committed to going forward!
Like everyone else, I have tried it all and struggled to make anything work 
long term. VI is the answer I have been looking for. It's not prepackaged. It's not a pharmaceutical secret. It's not 
a list of rules. It's not a temporary fix. It's not a fraud preying on human weakness for financial gain. It is the ease 
of eating the foods I choose to eat on a smaller scale and simply challenging my muscles more and more. It is 
not eating when I'm not hungry and budgeting my calories for when I do want to eat. It is not fitness for the 
physically fit - it is fitness to create fitness. It is a personal commitment with no strings attached. 
The biggest surprise for me has been my spiritual and emotional transformation. I am experiencing and enjoying 
an unfamiliar joy - I can only describe it as being "high on life!" I am not sad, angry, grumpy or tired anymore. 
My self-esteem, motivation, and optimism have been recharged. I am Beth again and that feels really good. I 
truly feel that the best years of my life are ahead of me. The added benefit of connecting with and developing 
friendships with so many likeminded women on VI has been an added bonus and such a blessing.
You led me to an amazing place Roberta and, because of that YOU will always be a part of my story. Thanks so 
much!
You are loved!
Beth
8
Beth Hill
Your New Venus Family
I'm writing this part to make sure you're going into this program with open honest eyes about what it is 
and what you can expect from it. You can have it all, you can lose all the weight and fat you've ever 
hoped for and you can change the look and shape of your body however you wish. And one of the best 
ways to get started is to talk to the Venus's in the community.
You can talk to many of our previous Venus transformation contest winners in the community and learn 
exactly how they did it. They'll be more than happy to share. You can also listen to their podcast 
interviews and absorb all of their insight and wisdom of how they managed to overcome their own 
personal struggles along the way to getting their Venus body. Everyone will have their own personal 
path to follow and I guarantee there is a Venus who has already done it that can help you with your 
personal challenges.
Venus members are always willing to help, many of the previous successful Venus's will take new 
Venus's under their wing and coach them through the process. Some form tight bonds with a few others 
and create txt messaging accountability friendships. Others find local Venus's in their area and actually 
meet each other in person to chat about the process, go for walks together and even workout together.
I've personally travelled to meet up with different Venus's and we've organized meet ups in various 
locations (Las Vegas being a crowd favorite) and there is always another meet up around the corner.
In short, there is a wealth of experience, information, support, and friendship waiting for you in the 
Venus community, all you need to do is introduce yourself and join the discussion. If you're not a 
'forum user' then you can just poke around and read for awhile, no need to start chatting if you're not 
100% comfortable at first.
The women of the Venus community are your new partners and team that will support you throughout 
the process of getting to your weight loss and fitness goals. Many have built lasting friendships that 
have transcended the community and turned into real life friendships. The community is waiting with 
open arms for you whenever you're ready to be a part of it. And to be clear, this is a secure community 
that is only available to active Venus Factor members, nobody else can read or access it. 
9
Podcast Interviews
As I mentioned already, most of our past Venus transformation success stories have done a podcast 
interview with me to reveal exactly how they achieved their weight loss and body shaping goals. There 
is priceless information in each of these interviews and you can listen to them all for free just by 
visiting our blog at www.venusindex.com
You can also find the podcast on itunes or whatever podcast aggregator you use by searching for 
'venusindex'.
10
Roberta Saum - The Venus Mindset
To me the Venus Mindset is a lifestyle that is about 
taking ownership and responsibility for my own 
health.  It is a belief that I can be healthy, lean, fit, 
muscular, and athletic within a mostly sedentary 
society that contains an overabundance of food.  
The odds of achieving this are against us in our 
society so it takes a strong and aggressive mindset 
to achieve this level of fitness and keep it.  It is a 
lifelong mindset.  You need to be an outlier and do 
things differently from everyone else.
The Venus Ideal goals were mostly part of the 
weight loss phase and gave me the weight range 
and shoulder and waist circumference to shoot for.  
Having a realistic and tangible goal was a key for 
staying on track and knowing I was headed in the 
right direction.  
It’s time to forget about what my scale weight is.  It’s time to not worry about what my waist measurement is.  
It’s time to enjoy the new me and the new clothes that still fit.  It’s time to enjoy being physically active and 
participate more in enjoying life.  It’s time to listen to what everyone in my family and society is telling me, 
“Wow you have an amazing physique and are so fit and healthy.  How did you do that?”
I’m learning to enjoy life a little more.  This is something I can do for the rest of my life.  It’s my new life.  It’s 
the Venus life.
Roberta Saum
11
Roberta Saum
Balance
This program is also about balance, both internally and externally. We fully expect you to have a 
balanced life between career/school, family, friendships, relationships, hobbies and getting the body 
you want. It's not an either/or situation. You should not, and will not have to put your life on hold to 
change your body. Any program that teaches you this sort of extreme action is doing something (and 
likely many) things wrong.
Internal & External Balance
The concept of balance starts with internal balance of your body from 
a metabolic and hormonal level, extending to a balance of your 
bodyfat levels and muscle, to a balance of your upper body and lower 
body proportions.
I want you to get away from extreme thinking in black and white 
terms. There is too much of this sort of thinking in diet and fitness and 
it leads to significant stress over the process and I believe this stress is 
the root of the failure that most women experience from dieting.
You'll find that I leave out many diet and fitness industry 'rules' about eating because I've learned 
they're simply not necessary and add stress to a process that is already stressful enough. What is left in 
this program are the essentials, just the tools that you need to succeed.
In the following section you'll learn about the major gender differences in metabolism and body 
composition, and why the Venus Factor is designed for women specifically. You'll see that when the 
systems of your body are out of balance it leads to difficulty losing weight. From there I'll explain how 
the program works to correct any imbalance and put you back in an optimal state to both lose your 
unwanted bodyfat and keep it off.
12
Res from the UK
As a 30 year old working mother I do not have 
time to waste. I do not have room in my head or 
my schedule for a hundred complicated diet and 
fitness mantras with which to punish myself on a 
24/7 basis. 
At this point you may well say, “Then you can 
forget about getting a better body. THAT’S a job 
in of itself!”  Hey, I’m a modern woman and we 
like to ‘have it all’ right? Luckily with Venus this 
becomes a realistic possibility. 
I joined Venus in January 2013. In 4 short months, I have achieved my best look  since pre-pregnancy, all whilst 
holding down two clinical placements and finishing my graduate studies with a First.
How did I do it?  *Clears throat* easily.  Yes, truly. I worked out no more than 3 times a week, I did zero cardio.  
In truth I hung out like the Venus de Milo herself spending weekends in Paris, Rome and London, sampling all 
the delicious fare these places have to offer. In short I lived my life.  The diet travels.
For me the Venus Mindset is one of true adaptability. The Venus solutions become a part of your life, they don’t 
take over. 
Venus is not a one trick pony.  I may be high maintenance but the diet and programs are not.
There was no fuss, no nightly planning, and no ‘falling off’ the diet. There was really no diet in the traditional 
sense to fall off of.
A Venus is adult enough to make her own food choices and mature enough to hold responsibility for them. 
A Venus doesn’t sit home sipping water and eating steamed veggies on a Saturday night. She’s out on the town at 
the best restaurants, in the best dress, enjoying herself.
The Venus lifestyle is one of commitment. But one that is joyfully made given the overwhelming physical 
returns. For just a little consistency you get a lot of progress.
The flexibility of the lifestyle makes it easy to side-step all the old diet blocks of more restrictive and 
complicated diet and training regimes.
Res from the UK
13
Res from the UK
Gender Differences In Metabolism
Men and women are different, this should be obvious at first glance. However, many people never stop 
to consider that the things that make men and women different on the outside, come from the inside.
Size Difference
There are some rather obvious differences in men and women from a metabolic standpoint. The first is 
that men in general have more lean body mass than women and as a result men can eat more calories 
than women while still maintaining a leaner body. I've often been out for dinner and noted that the 
serving sizes of food at a typical restaurant seem to be 'calibrated' for men. In other words, the portion 
served fits fine for me, but seems to always be too much for a woman who might be dining with me. 
It's a bit unfair that I can simply eat what is served while she will have to leave some on the plate if she 
is concerned at all about managing her calorie intake.
The alternative would be a world of portion sizes 'calibrated' for women where she could eat what is 
served and be perfectly satisfied without having to leave any food on her plate and I would have to 
order double the amount to be satisfied. It's a matter of perspective, but the latter case would be much 
more effective for weight loss as it's much easier to simply eat what is served to you compared to 
exerting the willpower to leave food on your plate.
Ok that is enough about the general size difference of men and women. The next big difference is how 
testosterone and estrogen affect our bodies.
14
Body Composition
Estrogen is what makes you a woman and testosterone is what makes me a man. Women and men alike 
have a normal healthy and important circulating level of both of these hormones. Your estrogen levels 
are much higher than the small amount a man would have, and likewise a man's testosterone level is 
much higher than your normal health levels.
Gender differences in estrogen and testosterone levels are what dictate the difference we see in the 
normal healthy ranges of body composition between men and women.
The normal body composition range for men is between 10%-20% bodyfat and for women is 20%-
30%.
Critically low bodyfat for men is approximately 3%, whereas for women critical low is approx 13% (as 
indicated by the appearance of potentially dangerous metabolic abnormalities).
Clearly there is a difference in the general normal body composition of men vs women.
A man can be at or below 10% bodyfat and look healthy and lean. A women achieving this level of 
bodyfat would actually look abnormal, sickly, and if enough muscle mass is on her body she will look 
overly masculine.
In my experience working with many different women I've found that a lower bodyfat limit of 
approximately 16% - 18% is as low as most women will ever want to go and still maintain a feminine 
look. Anything below 20% is considered 'athletic/elite' for women. To contrast this with men, a bodyfat
% of approx 8-10% would be necessary for a man to be viewed as athletic/elite.
These body composition differences are due to the effect testosterone and estrogen have on our ability 
to store and burn fat. This is totally normal and no reason for concern, it's simply why you are shaped 
like a woman and I am not. The take home message is not to compare your bodyfat percentage to that 
of a man (if you're thinking in terms of bodyfat at all).
Your target healthy range is between 20%-30%. Most of our Venus transformation contest winners 
arrive at their best figure anywhere between 18%-22%. Your specific best/happiest/healthiest look will 
15
be unique to you. We cannot predict with certainty what your bodyfat % will be when you arrive at the 
look you are happiest with, but my guess is it will be somewhere close this range of 18-22%. This is 
important: The goal is not 0% bodyfat, nor is it to reach a predetermined level of bodyfat because you 
think this is the number you should have. The goal is to create a body you love and are proud of. 
Mostly likely this will end up somewhere around the range of 18-22% bodyfat.
Let's do a brief summary of the gender differences we've talked about so far.
1. We know that you have more estrogen and less testosterone than men. It's what makes you a 
woman, and it also determines what your lower healthy bodyfat range will be.
2. You generally have less lean body mass than a man and therefore do not burn as many calories 
on a daily basis
3. Because of point 1 and 2 men can generally eat more calories than women and maintain a 
somewhat leaner body 
The next most important gender difference when it comes to fat loss is with the hormone leptin.
16
Lisa Barban Etwell – The Venus Mindset
The Venus Mindset and what it means to me.
If I were to put the Venus mindset into one word it would be 
EMPOWERMENT. 
Cutting out the static is critical in being a successful Venus. 
Having the knowledge that calories are king for fat 
loss/maintenance and that lifting heavy things builds shape is 
like owning a huge set of ear plugs protecting our ears and minds 
from the constant noise, myths, confusion and untruths being fed 
to us through the media and diet/fitness communities. 
Another form of empowerment is the right to choose. You get to 
decide whether you want your current shape or the shape of your 
choice. How?  By lifting heavy things. 
You get to decide whether you want your current body fat levels 
or ones that are less/more. How? By deciding how many calories 
you eat. 
Bottom line - YOU get to decide - and when you take the control and power of your own body back 
from those that hijack your goals - that is power. 
That is freedom.
So.. what is the Venus mindset?
Empowerment.  Choice.  Freedom.
That doesn't mean it's easy. But it does mean that you ultimately have all the power in the world to 
make ANYTHING happen.
17
Lisa Barban Etwell
Leptin
Leptin is a signalling molecule that is released from your fat cells that is 
typically described as the master hormone regulating fat loss, due to the fact 
that is more or less released in proportion to the amount of fat you have on 
your body. The more fat, the more leptin (Owecki M. et al. 2010). This 
however leaves out all of the other roles it plays, and it can actually be seen 
as a master signalling hormone that is involved in the regulation and 
signalling of bone density, metabolic rate, fat mass, cognition and memory, 
inflammation, taste and sweetness perception, insulin sensitivity, and even the pathogenesis of skin tags 
(Moran CN et al. 2011, de Boer TN et al. 2012, Horio N et al. 2010, El Safoury et al. 2010)
As you can see, leptin plays a significant role in many different systems of your body, and it's 
especially important to fat loss and overall appetite regulation.
Leptin is produced and released by bodyfat and one of its many duties is to signal your brain to the 
amount of fat on your body. It is also released in response to eating and tells your brain how much food 
you've just ingested. It also responds to exercise intensity and duration, as well as the amount of 
chronic inflammation in your body (Suzukawa M et al. 2011).
In other words, any typical diet intervention and/or exercise routine will stimulate a response in leptin. 
Since you have at least twice as much leptin as a man, your specific diet approach needs to be nuanced 
and designed to work for you as a woman. This doesn't mean you need to eat some wacky exotic food, 
it just means a different style of nutrition and exercise (if you choose to exercise) should be followed to 
maximize your results.
You have roughly twice as much leptin circulating in your system as a typical man does. Since leptin is 
a major metabolic signalling molecule you might think that means you should burn twice as many 
calories as a man. But that isn't the case. Typically when there is more of a hormone circulating in the 
blood that means it is required to be at that level for some reason, or that the other systems of the body 
are 'resistant' to that hormone. In the case of leptin it seems that women are somewhat naturally 
resistant to leptin compared to men. Resistance may seem like a harsh word, so instead think of it as it 
18
takes a little more leptin to do its job in a woman’s body compared to in a man’s body. And, this 
difference is increased with higher bodyfat levels. This is partly why it's difficult for women to start 
and stay consistent on a diet long enough to get the results they really want. It's also why severe low 
calorie and very strict dieting (AKA “Crash dieting”) doesn't work for women but might actually be 
more useful for men.
In two research studies done by Nicklas et al. in 1997 it was shown that leptin falls almost twice as 
much in women compared to men. This means that women experience higher leptin highs, lower leptin 
lows when attempting to diet. Men don't have these same dramatic swings in leptin as men have lower 
natural circulating leptin levels, and when men go on a calorie restrictive diet they don't get as much of 
a decrease in leptin. In other words, a man's metabolism won't crash on a severely calorie restricted diet 
as easily as it could in women. It also means men won't experience the same feelings of hunger and 
cravings for carbohydrates during a weight loss program. This might sound familiar to you if you’ve 
ever attempted to diet alongside a male counterpart and noticed how much easier of a time he seemed 
to have with it. 
The two main differences between men and women when it comes to leptin are:
1. Men seem to have a higher natural sensitivity to leptin and therefore lower natural circulating 
blood levels
2. When men go on a very low calorie restrictive diet they experience less of a drop in leptin and 
as such their metabolism doesn't crash as easily and they don't get as severe cravings for carbs 
To put it another way, women have higher natural leptin, and experience much more dramatic drops in 
leptin when dieting. So your highs are higher and your lows are lower. Kinda like being on a roller 
coaster with your metabolism and hunger and cravings throughout the dieting process. Does this sound 
familiar from the last time you attempted a restrictive diet?!
Recall that one of the main focuses of the Venus Factor program is balance. And in the case of leptin 
men have an easier go of it with balancing leptin while dieting. This is why so many diets that have 
been written or created and tested on and by men never really work out so well for women. Men can 
simply push through a low calorie diet with brute force without experiencing large drops or swings in 
19